Dear Jian Ghomeshi,

You are the latest man to disappoint. The latest man whose intellect, politics and ideology I’ve long respected and admired but who turns out, inconceivably, shockingly, to have troubling attitudes towards women. You’ve joined a very distinguished list, Jian.
Christopher Hitchens was the first to break my heart. His mastery of the English language made me swoon. I didn’t necessarily agree with everything he wrote, but I could never deny the eloquence and voracious intellect behind each of his opinions. I had him on a pedestal. So imagine my dismay when, in the days after his passing, while reading all the articles about him, I discovered a discourse relating to his apparent misogynistic and anti-feminist tendencies. I began to understand that arguing against women wearing a burqa or in favour of them being allowed to drive a car in Saudi Arabia is not necessarily the same thing as viewing all females as equal and worthy of respect.
Bill Maher also makes the list. For years I have loved his show and his anti-Republican rants. He too says so many of the right things. So many liberal and progressive views. And he has so many women on his show! For so long I wouldn’t allow myself to believe anything else. He is a champion of so many of my ideals, how could he possibly be so disappointing on this particular issue? But over the years it’s become impossible to ignore that so many of his jokes are intended for men – and so many of his punchlines are demeaning to women. I imagine this is how the women involved in the civil rights movement in the 60s must have felt when it became clear that their male counterparts, supposedly liberal and enlightened men, intended to do all the important work while the little ladies fetched them coffee.
And now we arrive at the next disappointment. And it’s a big one. It’s a man whom I still can’t quite believe I am adding to this list. A man who more than just says the right things. He’s a man who gets involved. He fights for the right causes. He speaks up. He shines a light. He is George Clooney. “But,” you may sputter, “He just married an internationally-respected human rights lawyer! His days of dating women whose sole role was to look good on his arm are over!” Are they? Yes, Amal Alamuddin, now Amal Clooney, is a highly respected lawyer who has represented Julian Assange and Yulia Tymoshenko. Her profile page on the Doughty Street Chambers website is spectacularly impressive. She is, as many have said, George Clooney’s intellectual equal. His intellectual superior, others have said. So what’s my problem? After the honeymoon, what was her very first case, widely reported on by the media? An international human rights issue, as she’s worked on in the past? No. In fact, not long ago, Mrs Clooney pulled out of an appointment with the UN Human Rights Council to investigate possible violations of the rules of war by the Israeli regime in Gaza. I wonder why. But back to her first case as a married woman. It’s the Greek Government’s attempt to have the Elgin Marbles returned by Britain. That’s right. She passed on dealing with the horrors of war in order to deal with pretty statues. Why do I have the sinking feeling that this admirable and accomplished woman is being encouraged to dumb herself down, to put it crudely, in order to make herself seem more “relatable” or “feminine” or “palatable” to Americans, just in case her husband decides to enter the political arena? Someone, please, prove me wrong on this.
There’s another name that may or may not belong on this list, but I can’t bring myself to discuss Bill Cosby. It’s like learning all over again that Santa isn’t real.
I don’t want to be right. I don’t want to believe that the men I have looked up to for so long ultimately think so little of my sex. I’d like nothing more than to be proven wrong. I’m sure you wouldn’t mind knocking some sense into me, right Jian? At least the first three men on the list have only been disappointing verbally or ideologically, never physically. But not you, Jian. I loved your show for so long. Your thoughtful, warm and intelligent interviews and commentary. Your talk with Mandy Patinkin has long been my go-to inspirational boost. But no longer. It’s all tainted. It’s clear now that demeaning and harming women gives you great pleasure. You’re the biggest disappointment on this ever growing list. Thank you for nothing.

Sincerely,
PC